The 5 Ds for weightloss


I was thinking back over my weight loss history and discovered the 5 Ds to be the fastest and most unnatural ways that I have lost weight. Yes, I included “Diets” in this list because there’s absolutely nothing more unnatural than reducing your whole-person to fit into a weight loss formula that makes you focus on food. Diets, like divorce, death and disease are physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting and destructive to our whole-person health. And, seriously, can we have a honest conversation about the history of weight loss drugs?

Think about this for a second, diet has the word die in it. Diets ask you to divorce yourself from your feelings, thoughts and anything that gets in the way of you obeying the formula. We have been conditioned to do whatever it takes to lose weight, even if that means taking drugs that have lethal side effects. Is dieting the cause of obesity and the epidemics of diet-related disease and sickness? Have diets destroyed our health by forcing us to focus on manipulating calories, instead of encouraging us to fill up on the best and most nutritious foods without rules?

We are not designed to diet just like we are not designed to experience death, divorce and disease, which is why these experiences are so devastating to our spirits, minds, hearts, bodies and relationships.

It’s time for the generations of women who have failed, succeeded and failed at dieting to tell the truth and help set generations of girls free from following in their weight loss obsession and free from the treadmill of disappointment and the formula for poor health.

Return to the basics of health and remember how you are designed to be healthy and whole. Life is hard enough, so stop focusing on food and depriving yourself of the nutrients you need to walk through the ups and downs of life. #vivealchemy#overit

Are your what-ifs keeping you from living?

img_0969Have you ever thought about how many what-ifs that you might be holding on to? There are what-ifs in our closets, “What if I lose 10lbs, then I can wear those clothes again?’. There are what-ifs in our garages, “What if I need a birdhouse lamp?”. There are what-ifs in our pantries, cabinets, storage units and there are what-ifs in our spirits, heart, minds, bodies, and relationships. Have you ever thought how what-ifs don’t really give us options or create opportunities to grow but keep us living in the past, unable to face the truth or set us free to live with open hearts, open minds, open spirits and open hands in the present? Could it be that all our what-ifs are not only wasting space, time, money, and energy but keeping us from living in a natural rhythm and flow to give and receive the love and truth we need to become our best selves?

I feel paralyzed by what-ifs. My closet is full of clothes that I haven’t worn in years and things in my garage now have 3 years of dust but what’s really holding me down are the what-ifs of my life, “What-if I had just stayed married, What-if I had spent more time with kids, What-if I had done more, done less or done something different”. What-ifs are at the root of my anxiety, fears, guilt and shame, and they rob me of everything I need to experience and enjoy my life right here and right now. They keep me hoarding things that will never produce peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. What-ifs keep me looking back, not trusting in the process of life or believing in the mystery and power of something greater than me. My what-ifs judge me and keep me perpetually looking back believing that I could have completely and perfectly controlled not only my life but the thoughts, feelings, and actions of others.

What-ifs do not motivate us and they cannot create change. They can only clutter our present opportunities to live, love, dream, risk, grow and flourish; and live how we are designed.

It’s time to clean out the what-ifs. It’s time to be set free from guilt, shame, pain, and fear and be set free to receive forgiveness, mercy, truth, and love. We cannot live with what-ifs because they distract, clutter and prevent us from living right here and right now. How do we clean out the what-ifs? We can start by telling the truth about them and asking ourselves questions about what we need to live today. Are we holding onto to crumbs of the past? Are we scared to clear out anger, guilt, shame, and pain and create the space for vulnerability, uncertainty, and mystery? Will we trust the process of letting go to open the pathways to give and receive love, truth, hope, and joy? Today, I encourage you to clean out every space that keeps you hoarding the crumbs of what-if and open your heart, mind, spirit and hands to the gifts that are being given today to fill you up with love, beauty, strength, care and nourishment.

You can be healthy.


Information alone will never give us what we need to be healthy. To be healthy is to be whole and to be whole requires the nourishment of our whole-person, which includes our spirits, hearts, minds, bodies and relationships. Correct information is just one piece of a process that we need to be whole-person healthy and it is necessary for educating but it is not education. Education informs us and creates a space for more. It helps to evolve our talents and skills while it flames the embers of imagination, creativity, passion and desire. Education helps to connect the internal and external pieces as it creates knowing. One result of education is knowledge but knowledge is not wisdom. Wisdom is the free gift that we give and receive as we move to give our time, talents and truth to love, encourage and educate others. Wisdom is what we all need to be whole-person healthy.

Stop reducing who you are and your health to diets and workouts. Rediscover how to open our spirits, hearts, minds and hands to truth and love to create the space for wisdom and become the healthy person you are designed to be. Join us in Vive Alchemy to remember that your health is not only in your hands but in your spirit, heart and mind.

We must take a stand for ourselves and our health.


In VIVE Alchemy, we live every day as we are designed to breathe, listen, ask, look and move to nourish our hearts, minds, spirits and bodies as a Whole-Person.

*We refuse to disconnect ourselves in order to get results.
*We refuse to reduce ourselves to a body just to “feel good”.
*We refuse to ignore our emotions/control our emotions. We listen to how we feel.
*We refuse to be spoonfed fragmented information and fragmented truths. We ask questions.
*We refuse to be told who we are, how we feel how to think and what to do. Institutions and programs are not our God.
* We refuse to do another program or another formula that demands us to not think or feel but just do. We are whole-people.
* We refuse to reduce life to a competition or to a game. We help others, we don’t compete with them.

VIVE Alchemy invites you to Give-Up being told what to do and how to live. You have a design that will flourish and it will give you the best results when you nourish it.

Physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and relational health cannot fit into a program and whole-person health happens when you live each day to nourish (love) yourself and others.

If you’re tired of doing the same thing over and over and over and getting those results, then VIVE Alchemy is a space for you to rest and rediscover how you are designed to get AMAZING results without trying to get results.

They say the right program delivers, I say you’re not designed to be delivered by a program.


Every day we are being diagnosed and every day we are being offered a delivery system.

You are overweight, here’s a diet. You are weak, here’s an insane exercise program. You are stressed, here’s a pill. You are wrinkly, here’s a cream. You are a bad mom, here’s a book.

Yes, there are literally thousands of delivery systems that promise to give us the perfect body, the perfect health, the perfect stress level, the perfect home, the perfect kids, the perfect marriage, the perfect skin, the perfect closet, the perfect vacation and ultimately, the perfect life. Given the availability of all these delivery systems, how many people have you met that actually have a perfect life or who completed the delivery system and was FINALLY delivered from ever doing the delivery system again?

Have you ever wondered why most delivery systems DO NOT work to deliver us? Perhaps it’s time we turned the tables and diagnosed these delivery programs. The reasons delivery programs do not deliver us:

  • They usually get the diagnosis wrong.
  • They try to deliver you through one part of yourself.
  • They try to deliver you from the outside in.
  • They are based on being fragmented and living a fragmented life.
  • You aren’t designed to be delivered by a delivery system.

First, delivery programs diagnosis is usually wrong. What we initially see is usually not the source of the problem. The most obvious issue is usually a result of the real problem. Stress, injury, pain, tiredness, weight issues, food issues, addictions and relationship problems are most often the “results” of deeper issues. If we spend all our time desperately trying to change the results, then the real problem causing those results is still there producing the same results

Second, programs that reduce you to a part of yourself—like a body, a mind, a spirit or a heart—can only deliver that part of you for a short period of time. Maybe you can get some control over your body by denying it, control your emotions by avoiding them, control your thoughts by distracting yourself with something else and maybe you’ll get control of your soul through religious practice. But when you spend all your time and energy trying to deliver yourself through one part of yourself, you are forcing parts of yourself to stop functioning as they are designed.

Let’s say you get some results like controlling your body with a diet, then what parts of yourself would you deny in order to continue using a diet to control your body. If you could get everything you wanted—like peace, joy, success, value and the love you always wanted—through a diet, then would you ever listen or get to know your heart, mind, body, and spirit? At the same time, if you were able to deliver yourself through your spirit or heart, would you ever listen to the needs of your mind and body?

Third, delivery programs fail because they are trying to deliver us from the outside-in. They give us solutions, hacks, formulas, programs, and ideas to manage (control) everything. 13 steps to manage your stress, 7 steps to manage your weight, 5 steps to manage your relationships, and thousands of other ways to control your kids, spouses, workplace, home, pets, clutter, car, health, emotions, spirit and on and on and on. These programs are based on us living fragmented lives and being a fragmented people where the mind, heart, spirit, body, and life are not only reduced to results but are operating independently from one another. Delivery programs do not take into account that we are a whole-people and we are mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually and relationally connected to create a balance, flow, and rhythm that enables us to experience and enjoy life. As long as we are trying to manage and control every aspect of our lives, then there’s no way we can properly care for our whole-person or enjoy ourselves or our lives.

So, what’s the real diagnosis? I don’t believe we have to be rocket scientists to see we have been trying to deliver ourselves for a long time and we are more exhausted, neurotic, overweight, obsessed, stressed, unhappy and lonely than we have ever been. Even if on the outside our lives and bodies appear to be manageable and under control, on the inside we are numb, sad, angry, insecure, lonely and tired. We are bingers but we are never full; we consume at the highest levels but it’s never enough. We are so busy controlling every aspect of our lives but we are falling apart.

The truth is that food, stress, kids, anxiety, spouses, homes, cars, power, fame, work, money, exercise and clutter are not the problems and they are not the solutions. It’s time we create the space to stop and rediscover who we are and how we are designed to live life in the present moment with hope, trust, peace, joy, and love with all our hearts, minds, spirits and bodies. It’s time we stopped asking to be delivered and started asking how we are designed to be.

The good news is that there are no delivery systems. There is just life and life was meant to be lived with the ups and downs, the good and bad, the challenges and successes with our whole-person feeling, thinking, moving and connecting as we are designed. The real problem is not that delivery systems don’t work but that we have forgotten how we are designed to not need delivery systems.  And we can be delivered from delivery systems by remembering how we are designed to breathe, listen, ask, look and move to nourish ourselves without expectations, results or using ourselves and all these amazing gifts that we have been given as a means to an end.

Aren’t we tired of being diagnosed? Did any of these programs, formulas, magic pills—and let’s not forget books, classes, seminars, retreats and lots of products deliver us? You are invited to give up using delivery systems to get control over things you can never get control over. You are invited to give up trying to control life and just live it, one crazy full day at a time and discover how you are designed to VIVE.


What will stop the obesity epidemic?


Ok, hold on a minute. Let’s give the medical industry a little break. It is true that doctors receive little to no formal education on nutrition and the prevention of disease has (in the past) had little support or interest in the medical community. But it’s not really their fault. Why? Maybe, because they didn’t go to medical school to prevent sickness and disease but to treat it. Come on, no one watches Grey’s Anatomy to see a bunch healthy plant-based people walking around talking to doctors about their good health.

Still, at some point, someone made a decision that it was more profitable to continue treating disease and sickness, and pills were a lot easier to prescribe than prevention. But, in so doing the medical community created a void of leadership, research and real authority that has since been filled up with thousands of self-proclaimed health and wellness “experts”. No doubt, there was a real demand. But our diet and fitness experts have since oversupplied the market with an endless amount of  formulas, programs, potions, and products that have completely fragmented our understanding and approach to health and wellness. What has been the results of our diet and fitness experts? Nothing less than an epidemic of extremely unhealthy results and an overload of confusing and contradicting misinformation.

In Knoxville and throughout our country, obesity and diet-related sickness and disease are at epidemic levels in youth and adults. Yet, how can this be when we live at a time with more access to information, diets, workouts, hacks, tips, technology, and diet foods than at any time in human history? In fact, our workouts or more insane than ever, diets come in all shapes and sizes and fitness experts are everywhere. Could it be that these experts and their extreme approaches to health have led us to believe that to be healthy means that we must spend all our time in the gym, make our workouts hurt, eat in extreme ways, always diet and be obsessed with both our bodies and food? Is it because health looks and feels so unnatural and requires so much time, energy, rules, restrictions, reps, sets, supplements and effort that people have just given up any hope of being healthy?

What if I told you that to be healthy, you must stop trying to control your body and trust its design? What if I said that spending all that time in the gym working on your body or your booty does not translate into good health? What if I told you that walking is enough? What if I told you that all this excessive training does not necessarily lead to a healthier or happier you? What if I told you that all these “experts and gurus”, who are telling you what to do, are just as confused about health as they need you to be in order to profit off your confusion? Seriously, I don’t know how a bodybuilder diet made its way into mainstream America or how in the world ketosis is even something a person would even consider before eating natural, whole foods.

It’s time we understood the difference between what it means to train for a sport, what it actually takes to build muscle to get a specific physique and what it takes to just be healthy. It’s time to set people free from a very unnatural and unrealistic idea of what “shape” and “fitness” looks like and set people free to practice a basic health routine that nourishes our whole-person. It’s also time to have an honest conversation about weight gain, obesity and inactivity without it shaming people.

Truth is to be healthy and fit:

  • You don’t have to lift weights.
  • You don’t have to go to the gym.
  • You don’t have to diet or exercise extremely hard.
  • You do have to stop using food as a means to end.
  • You do have to break-up with your bad relationship with food.
  • You might want to give the diet and fitness industry the middle finger and quit being told what to do.
  • You don’t have to do CrossFit, run a marathon or do a headstand.
  • You do have to start using your brain and listening to your body.


Health is the practice of truth and love. So, let’s tell the truth.

  • All these exercise programs are based on theories.
  • We have been led to believe in a very fragmented formula and out-dated training programs that break us down physically, mentally, emotionally and relationally.
  • Being in shape or skinny will not make all your dreams come true nor does it mean you are healthy.
  • Being overweight is not a joke and weight gain should be taken seriously.
  • Diets are based on weight loss theories.
  • In 2018, they are just now figuring out the importance of gut health and how we are destroying our health with a high protein/low carb diet.
  • Core training is a myth.
  • HIIT training is a scam.
  • Most diet and fitness “experts” are not telling you the truth about what they have to do on a daily basis to look and lift like they do.
  • Most doctors are uninformed when it comes to any type of understanding of nutrition and fitness.
  • Boot camps are an extreme and unnecessary way to burn a small number of calories while setting you up for short-term injury and long-term breakdown.
  • You aren’t burning as many calories as your fitness watch says.
  • Most supplements are useless and most likely dangerous.
  • That girl or guy, who you don’t know, but you follow on Instagram does extreme things, has the genetics, does the surgeries, uses photoshop, knows how to pose, takes the pills and has the time to do things that most people cannot do to look that way.
  • You cannot out-exercise a bad diet.
  • Food won’t save you.
  • Information is powerless to change the real reasons that we are addicted to food.
  • Formulas and programs do not work for us living, breathing, feeling and thinking human beings.
  • You already have everything you need to be healthy.

There is a way to be healthy that does not require a lot of time, energy or money but does require your participation as a whole person. Your health is in your hands. Trust your design and stop trusting people, who you do not know and who just wants to sell you a diet, a to-do list, an exercise program and a formula that reduces you to a result. Rediscover how you are designed to VIVE.


Let your light shine

Mom2moMCan we stop using labels to describe ourselves and others? Because it is not only disconnecting us, inciting fear, roadblocking relationships and sabotaging communities but it is stunting our own personal growth and development.

I am so tired of labels. They are beyond ridiculous and they do not in anyway communicate who we really are, how we are designed to connect as human beings and why we desperately need each other and not a label to become a community of healing, hope and health. Any label that we use to tell people who we are or others use to tell us who we are, reduces our whole-person to a belief, an opinion, a way of eating, a relationship, a description, an age, gender, a political stance, a workout, a religion, a socioeconomic level, the way we look or even the way we feel.

These neat little labels interfere with the limited time, space and opportunities that we have been given to know someone different and maybe even discover something different about ourselves. We are not only designed to be known and accepted but we are desperate for it. When we use a label to summarize our whole-person, we create a boundary that makes it hard to create the space for us to be known at the deep levels we desperately need and want.

Take a deep breath and create the space to be with me for a minute. Open your heart and mind by allowing your past, prejudices, preferences, posts, opinions, judgments and fears to fall away. Perhaps in this present moment, I can help you see that beneath age, color, race and gender, we are all human beings who live, breathe, eat, exercise, sleep, poop, drink, laugh, cry, move, speak, feel, think, hope, dream, create, work, play and love.

Not only do we all “do” a lot of the same things as human beings, but we are designed as human beings to “be” the same at the deepest level and be vulnerable, sensitive, fragile, weak, needy, insecure, transparent, desperate and dependent on love and truth to tell us who we are and how we are designed to live. I just wish every human being could see how beautiful and good this human being design is and how we need it to taste, see, smell, hear and feel love. I wish we could allow love to tell us who we are, that we are all gifts and watch that truth transform us, and set us free to love, care, nourish, respect, honor, enjoy and share our whole-person.  I wish I could help you understand that you can “be” that voice of love for yourself and others.

Listen to me, you are born to be a gift to yourself, your family, your friends, your community and your world. We need you and our world needs you to let your freaking light shine and share your time, talents and truth to love and encourage us. You know what blocks your light? A big sticky label. So, rip that sucker right off and bring your gifts to a world that desperately needs all of you.



The birth of Vive Alchemy

ViveShoot_May17-44I have been in a very weird place the last 4 years. It has seemed as if I have been growing and birthing a baby. However, I am not actually having a human baby for the fourth time but I have been watching my whole life come together to create VIVE Alchemy. See, Vive Alchemy is not really a business. I did not create something to make money or find a new angle to do what I have always done. No, VIVE Alchemy is my truth and it is not just my truth spiritually, but my truth emotionally, mentally, physically and relationally. It is all of me and all things past (experiences, skills, mistakes, successes) merging with all things present to create something tangible that can live, grow and evolve beyond me.

How does all of this come together (everything in the past, who I am, what I believe, dreams, hopes passions and truth) to become something I can hold in my hands and then share with the world? Honestly, I cannot begin to tell you exactly how all this has happened other than ALCHEMY (which is why it’s the name of my business). I don’t know if you are familiar with alchemy but it is a mysterious process of taking basic elements and combining them in just the right way to make gold.

My life has not been so much of a journey but more of a process like alchemy. This process has taken my basic truths (my design, past mistakes, successes, hopes, dreams, passions, dislikes, likes, fears, weaknesses, strengths, skills, talents, experiences and who I am) and put me in the hands of the divine Alchemist, who has done what He does best and worked all things for good. During this process, not only was the idea of control ripped completely out of my hands, but I was exposed at very deep levels. Yet, this was where I found myself weak, vulnerable, fragile, transparent, desperate and dependent on something bigger than me to discover just exactly who I was, how I was designed to live and what I was designed to give to the world. It seems that all the ways that I had tried to fill myself up with strength, independence, toughness, security and control just got in the way of me being me and living the life of love I was designed for.

I do believe you find your true-self when all the performing, earning and proving has stopped and you are forced to live how you are designed. It’s here you discover the best parts of you and even the worst parts of you. In other words, it is here where you can be honest and it is this truth that creates the space to be known and accepted; and where truth and love overflows to transform us, our relationships, our communities and our world. And that’s exactly what happened to me. Everything that I hid behind or ran to for cover had to be removed, so that I could stand in this wide-open space butt-ass naked to see love shining through my weakness, vulnerability, neediness and desperation. So welcome friends, VIVE Alchemy is me and it my gift to you to find hope, health, honesty, new habits and happiness. I invite you to rediscover who you are and how you are designed to VIVE.

Stop selling our kids a broken health formula.

A photo by frank mckenna.

I live in one of the most unhealthy cities in the country. My home state is first in youth obesity and sixth in adult obesity in the U.S. We are not just an unhealthy state but we are an extremely unhealthy nation and we all live in the wild wild West of health and wellness. In this environment of overwhelming information, nonsense and poor health, we have been easily captured by the loudest and most extreme products or programs promising fast results, despite their proven inability to transform health.

Case in point, I recently set up a VIVE table at a local elementary’s health and wellness fair. I kid you not, I had not finished setting up my table before I heard the words “macro and micro nutrients”. Literally, these words make the hair on the back of my neck stand up and of all places to pimp protein shakes, why in the world would you do it to a bunch of 5 to 10 year olds. But why not, when across the gym a “certified personal trainer” was timing kids doing burpees. Thank God, on my left the local nonprofit gym brought hula hoops and jump ropes, because the other tables were signing kids up to participate in organized sports (and we all know organized sports are not free and not just for fun). Sidenote: I am all about sports but these are elementary kids and they deserve to have a chance to enjoy exercise and be encouraged to play. Seriously, give them a freaking chance to develop naturally and learn to just play a sport for fun and enjoy exercise.

Here we had a perfect opportunity to differentiate health and wellness from sports and to introduce kids to a different way to think about and do health and wellness, but well intentioned adults subjected kids to the same fragmented diet and exercise formula that has failed at least 70% of them. (70% of adults are overweight and obese) Instead of setting kids free to practice health at the most basic level, we squandered an opportunity to teach curious minds and open hearts, by trying to sell products and programs. Unfortunately, we (once again) reduced health and wellness to results, shakes, competition, heavily processed “health foods”, technology and sports; and we did it without any structured classroom teaching.

I am not going to say I was surprised by the scene. Well, maybe the protein shakes surprised me but with a $137.00 worth of Vive health cards, I was ready to plant seeds of free health truths. In all, I spoke to about 50-60 kids. Honestly, it was super fun and the kids were sweet and attentive. Yet, here is a public school that serves a middle to upper middle class community and these kids have plenty of access to fruits, vegetables and healthy foods but only 2 kids knew what foods had fiber, 2 associated fiber with fiber bars, at least 10 wore fitbits and none knew a basic health routine that included the synergistic effect of sleep, sun, play, water, laughter, fiber, walking and laughter.

Seriously, the whole thing made me upset. I believe kids and adults deserve a fighting chance to experience a new approach to health that understands the importance of being known and accepted, the necessity of being given the truth that sets one free to know who they are and trust how they are designed, and the encouragment to practice daily routines and exercises that honor and respect their design (and the same design that their neighbors share). But, the only way kids are ever going to be healthy is if they are surrounded by truth, love and healthy adults, who are practicing healthy routines with them.

Think about it, what if every station was filled with healthy adults, who were practicing the same basic health routine and encouraging an understanding of health that included the spirit, heart, mind and body as a whole. What if we actually taught kids that health is not a program but a daily practice of nourishment? What if kids began to see that healthy communities need the presence of healthy people, who know rest, love, peace, emotional awareness, truth, art, music, passion and imagination more than they know how to do burpees and drink a protein shake? What if we stopped talking about workouts and diets and started practicing healthy routines that teaches kids that being healthy and practicing health gives us results that cannot be measured, timed, calculated or scored? Truth is that we are never going to out-exercise and out-diet poor health with the same programs, formulas and understanding that has created the epidemic results of disconnection, confusion and apathy that we are currently experiencing.

Yet, it is not too late. We can start over and we can move to restore a common sense approach to health that teaches us that no one in history has uttered the words “macro and micro nutrients”, until we started selling something to people, who had forgotten how they are designed. It’s time that we returned to a whole-person approach to health and addressed a missing foundation of truth that has allowed a fragmented approach of health and wellness to reduce people to results and health to a diet and exercise program. We don’t have to squeeze ourselves or our kids into a one size fits all fragmented weight loss formula. We can bring common sense and basic understanding back to health; and set people free to be healthy by practicing the most basic routines that saturate their spirits, hearts, minds, bodies and relationships with the nutrients that they need to live. Together, we can help create a community that sets kids and adults free to be healthy (fitbits not needed or required).

Give up the grind.

3DD968F6-C3CC-4792-92B7-63A8584E1725You don’t need to work harder.
You don’t need more discipline.
You don’t need more focus.
You don’t need tougher workouts.
You don’t need harder exercises.
You don’t need a diet.
You don’t need a better program.
You don’t need to be broken down.
You don’t need to focus on change.
You don’t need more reps or sets.
You don’t need f…ing motivation.

I want you to discover what real health feels and looks like; and how you are naturally designed to “be” healthy. You aren’t designed to “just do it” but you are designed to be a whole-person, who isn’t defined by what you can or cannot do.

When you know who you are and how you’re designed to eat, sleep, drink, sleep, breathe, listen, ask, look and move to nourish your spirit, heart, mind, body and relationships, then you WILL become emotionally, physically, spiritually, relationally and mentally healthier as WHOLE-PERSON.

Do you want to be at a healthy weight?
Do you want to be less stressed?
Do you want to be less busy?
Do you want to be healthier?
Do you want real friends and community?

Of course you do. We are naturally designed to become our best selves. However, we are not going to find ourselves doing a program or a formula. We are not going to find heath/wholeness in anything that wants to separate our hearts, spirits, minds and bodies to get a result.

You know what I gave-up when I had six-pack abs? I gave-up loving my heart, my mind, my community and my spirit to make sure I ate and worked out when I was supposed to. The more I focused on my body, the more obsessed I became with my body. Thankfully, I was brought to a point that I had to admit that I had joined in the practice of reducing myself to a body to get results that told me who I was and what to do.

I didn’t understand how I was designed and we don’t understand the way we are designed to be healthy, when our whole day revolves around what we eat, how we exercise, what we buy and what we do. Instead, we live as bodies and we live as consumers, when we attempt to fill ourselves up and change ourselves from the the outside-in. We live as bodies and surrender living to do whatever is “guaranteed” to “change our lives and get results”; and we grind it out regardless of the anxiety, pain, fear, guilt, loneliness, hopelessness or shame that results from what we are doing.

For example, social media has resulted in increasing levels of anxiety and loneliness but we keep logging on for more. Eating has resulted in sickness and disease but we keep eating whatever makes us “feel good”. We eat, don’t eat, exercise, don’t exercise, watch, scroll, work and worship to get results, even when those results are hurting our spirits, hearts, minds, bodies and relationships.

Have you ever stopped to think that grinding it out keeps us from being known and accepted by keeping us disconnected from ourselves, others and the world. Perhaps, it is not your effort or lack of effort but these formulas and programs that are producing an epidemic of unhealthy results. It’s time to remember that we are not designed to eat, exercise, drink, worship, work, play and consume our way out of shame, guilt, fear or pain and into love, joy, hope, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness or self-control.

It’s time to step away from beating yourself up and having others beat you up to do better/ try harder. It’s time to give-up the grind and listen, learn, live and love. I don’t know where this process will take you but I can promise that it will be better than being reduced and using the hell out of one part of yourself to “get” a result.

You are amazing. You have a beautiful design. It’s time to rediscover your design and the life you are designed to live. Join me for a new way and new conversation about everything we do to get everything we already have been given at